I am BLESSED.

This evening we are having DirectTV installed. Now, let me just start this blog by stating how much I absolutely HATE having people in my house that I don't know. After our break-in and robbery a couple years ago, I have this thing about being extremely uncomfortable with strangers in my home. I had no idea it was that BIG of a problem. I started having anxiety and becoming just generally bitchy while he was working away. As I was cooking dinner (and after taking my “crazy pill” so I could relax a little and stop acting like I needed to be admitted), I thought..."geez, I hate having this dude here, but my mom raised me to have SOME manners,” so I offered him a plate of dinner since it looked like it would be a late night for him and it would just be rude to start chowing down without at least asking. Sure enough the man was really hungry and pretty much licked the plate clean. As he ate, he paused and sighed in delight. I would soon know why.
He joked later that I was "hired" and that he'd be stopping by same time tomorrow for dinner once again. After some small talk between him and Jason, I overheard him say something about not having a home. Since I was in the other room, I thought that I'd surely misheard him. Jason was talking to him about how he must be wanting to get home soon since it was getting late and it must be hard to be away like that on daily basis. He casually answered "well, not really. I just sleep in my truck."  .....Huh? Seriously??
Jason said "you're shitting me right?!" He continued that he had recently fallen on hard times and just didn't have it in the budget right now to have a place of his own.             WOW.
He didn't elaborate too much, but simply said that he's been moving around to be close to his kids whenever his ex-wife moved and it's just been hard. How sad.
Though "Steve" declined, Jason offered him a shower in our guest bathroom and we paid him a little extra for the satellite setup than was owed to him. I guess it was our way of saying Merry Christmas to someone who clearly needed a step up. I feel so bad for him. I mean it wasn't as if he wasn't working and trying to make some money, he didn't act as though he had any kind of addiction (and by now, I think I'm pretty good at detecting that kind of stuff....I've had plenty of practice between my own crazy family and the time I spent working at the SBUX in the 'hood), and he genuinely just seemed down on his luck.
As I sat in the next room wrapping the Christmas gifts I'd purchased for my family, thinking that I am certainly blessed.
Blessed for sure, and not just with material things either. I have a husband who adores me, a family that is always there for me (right or wrong), and I've also been blessed to know love from them, and a few very close friends, in a way I just can't explain great enough to really give you a sense of how fortunate I feel right now.
With a full heart, I am counting my every blessing this evening.
'Tis the season, right?

WTF are they thinking?!

Everytime I watch "16 and Pregnant" on MTV, I am dumbfounded. How are these little girls not absolutely FREAKED the F' OUT?! I will be 30 years old in about a week and I am still overwhelmed by the idea of being a mom in the next year or so. These girls all say the same stupid things "I just know he's going to be a good dad" or "this is going to make him see that he needs to stick around." And guess what....they, too, are stupid. They are 16 year old boys that don't have to stick around and these girls are just devastated when they stop coming around. Was I the only one who saw that coming?
Does no one talk to these kids? How are they so far removed from reality? One common theme amongst the kids on this show is their own family....or lack thereof. They seem to all come from broken homes. Now, don't get me wrong. I do not think that is an excuse for their lapse in judgement because I, too, come from a severely-dysfunctional-could-not-be-more-broken-home, and somehow I seemed to figure out early on that it just wouldn't be a good idea to bring a baby into the mix as a teen.

<sigh>
Ok, I'll get off my soapbox now.

The Real Housewives of South TX

As of this evening...I am now a housewife (aka unemployed). Unfortunately, I am not rich like the ones on tv, nor as entertaining, since now the most interesting thing I have to do is decide whether to mop the floors and grocery shop on Monday or Tuesday. I also don't have the drama like those girls on tv do (thank God!).
But it already feels weird. We went out to eat to celebrate tonight and when I told Jason "thank you" for dinner, it hit me that it really was HIM paying for it now. It really has been mostly him paying for stuff for quite some time now since my checks were a joke by comparison, but this is different. I'm not used to this at all. He seems excited. I think he kinda likes the idea of me keeping up the house, cooking dinners and taking some classes until I can start helping him with the business.
I keep feeling like I ought to be worrying about something or someone at the office, or figuring out what my schedule will look like for next week, but then I am reminded of the blissful silence that I have in store. No more will my phone ring and someone want to tell me all about how they don't think this or that is fair, or how so and so isn't doing what they're supposed to do, or even better "why do they get that schedule and I don't?". Yes, blissful silence.
Perhaps my medications will be reduced now. Afterall, I didn't have to start on any bp meds until this job, and it seemed that my shrink has been steadily increasing my crazy meds ever since I took on the role of babysitter...uh..I mean HR Director.
Staff members kept asking me all week if I was sad to be leaving and the answer is NO. There are a few I will truly miss working with, but now I can actually hang out with them without the favoritism issue hanging overhead. Honestly, I'm so damn happy to be leaving and to soon be achieving something I've been chasing for a long time. I am feeling very blessed to be able to comfortably quit and pursue something fulfilling. I am even more blessed to have a husband that is not only incredibly supportive, but sees my vision too!
And to top it all off, I get to spend time at home during the holidays!!!!! SOOOOOO excited about that! I want to put our tree up tomorrow, but I will wait. One more week won't kill me ;)  I've already been picking up a few more ornaments to add to my collection. You can be certain I'll post a pic once everything has been decorated.
Let the baking begin!

he who laughs last, laughs best?

I've done it...I've given in and started a blog.
It's not like I have anything good to say; I just figured I'd try not to be the last one on Earth to do it. (kinda like I was probably the last person this side of retirement left on the planet who hadn't seen an episode of Jersey Shore...Let's just hope I enjoy this more.)

I guess I'll start with my blog title. I was shopping in Salado, TX, with mom and sisters last week and saw a sign in a cute little shop that said, "Just another freakin' day in paradise." I couldn't have said it better myself. Rhonda and I were cracking up about it saying I should get it just to leave on my office door on my last day of work this week. For some reason, it has stuck with me since (probably because I have such an appreciation for sarcasm or maybe because it's true.) When my dreams meet reality, sarcasm and irony generally ensue.

So my A.D.D. just kicked in and I left this blog for a moment to read my daily horoscope and it is spot on:

You may have had a hard time lately reaching your objectives. Unfortunately for you, Sagittarius, today will be no different. You may begin to feel a bit dissatisfied with the way your life is going at the moment. You will ask yourself certain questions about your goals. Does your personal life live up to those goals? Can you express your wonderful creativity as much as you'd like?

Woah. For those of you that don't know, I began my degree in interior design MANY years ago, but never finished it. After talking to a few in the biz and getting a quite blatant remark from a dear friend of, "Really? You need a degree for that? You either get it or you don't. You can't teach someone to know what looks good," I looked up a couple of courses at another univ here in SA to learn how to get my start. The program is only 10 months and they get you an internship as part of the course. I'm STOKED. The problem is that I've caught on about this great program half way through the session. (Remember that dreams vs. irony thing I was talking about?) The idea is to get started and have an additional service to offer through our new business Jason and I started this summer, JA Bowen Design & Consulting.
Now, I say that WE started this business, but technically he's been the one running the show. I've been keeping the rest of our house and lives going....that counts, right? I have recently put in my resignation at work (only 4 days of hell left!) to pursue these dreams that seem to insist upon laughing in my face. I'm determined to be the one laughing last.
Here goes nothing...